


"...where dean defends his virtue on the playground"

by sidnihoudini



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Established Relationship, Kid Fic, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-11-22
Updated: 2008-11-22
Packaged: 2017-10-08 01:32:16
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,229
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/71321
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sidnihoudini/pseuds/sidnihoudini
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>All Sam wanted him to do was drive the three blocks between here and the elementary school. All Sam wanted him to do was park the car, he didn't even care if it was a no park zone, he could deal, but all he wanted Dean to do was park the damn car and then wait at the gate for Milo to come tottering out of the school doors.</p><p>Instead, Dean gets into a fight with another dad about how his daughter is not gifted, you crazy son of a bitch, and Sam gets called to the principal's office -- the principal's office -- because Dean couldn't keep his hands in his damn pockets.</p>
            </blockquote>





	"...where dean defends his virtue on the playground"

All Sam wanted him to do was drive the three blocks between here and the elementary school. All Sam wanted him to do was park the car, he didn't even care if it was a no park zone, he could deal, but all he wanted Dean to do was park the damn car and then wait at the gate for Milo to come tottering out of the school doors.

Instead, Dean gets into a fight with another dad about how his daughter is not gifted, you crazy son of a bitch, and Sam gets called to the principal's office -- the _principal's office_ \-- because Dean couldn't keep his hands in his damn pockets.

 

.

 

"You can't just swing at a guy, Dean!" Sam yells, throwing his jacket down onto the couch as he passes it by.

Dean storms through the living room after him, still riled up about the whole "she's not a baby Einstein" thing.

"That guy was an idiot, Sam!" Dean snaps, kicking his boots off, one after the other. His left boot gets stuck half on his foot and he hops around for a second, trying to shake it free. Sam has already disappeared into the kitchen, though, muttering under his breath about how he's going to have to start keeping Dean on a leash.

Sam comes back into the front hall, clearly never one to not get the last word in an argument, and opens his mouth to start yelling again, but abruptly cuts himself off, and looks around the room.

"Dean, where's Milo?" Sam asks, looking over at Dean with his eyebrows raised.

Dean stares back for all of a half a minute before he spins on his heel and marches right back out the door.

 

.

 

"Sorry buddy," Dean breathes, a little out of breath from jogging between the front stoop and driveway. It's outta season, so he's a little out of shape. It's not his fault there's an awesome coffee and doughnut store right down the street.

Milo nods and watches Dean unbuckling him from the seat.

"It's okay," He says, understanding.

Dean smiles at him and hoists his kid outta the back seat, hip checking the door to get it to close.

The bitch face Sam has waiting for him upon arrival back into the house is completely staggering.

 

.

 

Dean's still grumbling under his breath about what happened earlier as they're eating dinner later that night, a truly spectacular pot of macaroni and cheese sat in the center of the kitchen table.

"I'm gonna get dirty looks from that principal, now," Sam snaps at him, interrupting the quiet monologue Dean had going where he was shaking his head and laughing to himself under his breath.

Sam thinks Dean might be going a little crazy in his old age.

"You don't think he didn't look at you funny before?" Dean asks, raising his eyebrows. He's got a piece of macaroni stuck to his front tooth, though, so the impact isn't as hard as it could've been. "You're eighteen damn feet tall!"

Scowling at Dean over the top of the pot, Sam shakes his head and then turns to Milo, who is happily moving his dinner swimming in ketchup around his plate. Sam leans over and tries to push the majority of the noodles falling off the side of the dish back on with his fingers, "Want some more?"

"Nope," Milo shakes his head and takes a huge bite, chewing with his mouth closed like Sam always tells him to.

Dean chews what's left in his mouth and then points his fork across the table at Sam. "That guy was crazy, Sam. You should've seen him. That little bitch was not special for playing the first three notes of Chopsticks on the piano."

"Don't call kids bitches," Sam sighs, reaching for his water. He eyes Dean over the table. "You didn't call her that to her dad's face, did you?"

Looking like he ate something sour, Dean makes a face and shakes his head.

"That guy was delusional," He says, more to Milo than anything.

Milo nods his head yes more for the sake of agreeing with Dean than the fact that he actually knows what he's agreeing to.

"Delusional," Milo repeats, taking another bite.

 

.

 

Sam's the one who has to face the dad, the kid, the principal, the teacher, and the rest of the parents the next morning. Somehow, everyone in the school knows. Maybe even the janitor.

"Uh," Feeling like an ass on Dean's behalf, Sam walks Milo to the doorway of his classroom, and kneels down in front of him. "Be extra nice to that girl daddy was mean to yesterday, okay?"

Milo nods like he means it, so Sam ruffles his hair before shooing him the rest of the way into the room.

The teacher gives him a once over from where she's standing on the other side of the room, so Sam smiles at her and waves, then turns around and promptly walks head first into the guy Dean got into dad wars with yesterday.

"Sorry," Sam apologizes automatically, taking a step back. The guy looks like a total stepford, and the little girl with blond hair and bright blue eyes standing beside him in a pretty party dress dregs up a lot of well, uh, bad memories.

The guy gives him the once over and then says, "Your husband is an ass."

"He's not my -- " Sam starts automatically, but then ends up sighing and looking back down at the little girl. She frowns at him. "Yeah, he can be."

 

.

 

"Well?" Dean gapes at him, the second Sam walks back through the front door.

Sam shuts the door behind him and starts pulling his jacket off. Dean watches him with wide eyes from where he's sitting on the couch, TV turned on and tuned in to a repeat of _The Late Show_, which is oddly enough shown around here as a morning show.

"The guy was a total jackass," Sam agrees, walking over to the couch.

Dean nods like he means it and throws a hand out in agreement. "I told you!"

"Yeah," Sam sighs again as he falls into the couch next to Dean. Dean, as expected, turns back to the TV and hunches forward to resume in on his plate of bacon and eggs. Sam watches his profile for a second, then smirks and says, "He thought you were my wife."

The offended look Dean throws at him is priceless at best. Sam starts laughing, and reaches forward to steal a piece of bacon off the side of Dean's plate. If Dean weren't still thinking about being considered someone's female counterpart, Sam's pretty sure he would've been speared with a fork by now.

"Totally not the girl," Dean finally says, probably more to make himself feel better than anything else. Sam snorts another laugh and relaxes back into the couch, throwing one foot up on the table. As the show goes to commercial, Dean looks at him over his shoulder and raises an eyebrow as he says, "If I woulda beat that guy up when I had the chance he wouldn't have said that."

Sam rolls his eyes and picks a piece of lint off of the shoulder of Dean's shirt. "I dunno, man. That whole overcompensation thing."

"Shut up," Dean says, but goes back to his breakfast, anyways.


End file.
